A Story Untold, Pt. 1

Once upon a time has been used, perhaps, in this setting, just once, too many times. No, this will not be a happily ever-after fantasy. I’ll save for those poor souls who need it more that journey. Quite instead, I think we’ll begin ours a bit, differently this time ’round. You see, I’ve never been one to be able to sit and write quite so easily; finishing a story in its entirety, but rather, offer extreme glimpses over the whole of a lifetime. Mayhaps this time shall be different, I hope.

Oh, I don’t recall so easily how, or even why I ended up sitting down at that moment, but it was crucial that I did. More so, that I begin writing down my thoughts as they quickly, almost quietly slipped past my conscious. These words needed to be writ before it was too late to capture them. See here now, that once the thought has occurred in such a manner, nay shall it be allowed to do so the same again. And shouldn’t that be the point of it all? To have the stroke of genius strike but only once to a man? No, I didn’t think so either, least before sitting down that night.

Sadness is a human affliction, or so we’ve been lead to believe. Rather differently I believe, it is an affliction of life. One that spans all creatures, regardless if they have higher functions or not. Though there are different levels of sadness, to be felt by each, at different times, and with different intensities, there are some to whom, rather unfortunately, must deal with great shades of pain and sadness, all within a single lifetime of living. Then there are those poor souls, who must deal with it all in extremely short spans of time. Some turn to dull the pains brought, others are driven made by it. While some, much like myself, abuse it in order to bring new life from it. We don’t control it, but we also don’t let it control ourselves. We simply respect it, learn from it, and every now and then, ride the waves as they come crashing.

See here, this writer’s heart, mind, and soul have all been through levels of hell unfathomable to others. But yet here it wrote this, still kicking, fighting, dying. It’s oft been writ before, and to be so again, of the pain and suffering that we’ve journeyed through together. It’s been broken, abused, and used more times than care to recall. It’s also known immense joys within incredible sorrows. Yet all three continue to press forwards. There are times, oh there are many times, when it all comes swelling once more within. A few stray tears will fall, and the room heavy, will grow. But the journey still continues to carry forth from depths once unknown.

A Letter From Daddy

My Dearest Emersyn,

From the moment of your birth, to this day, and every day that has yet to pass; you have, and will always be loved. You have an amazing personality, a magnificent soul within you. Each day, you have continued to grow into a beautiful person, and I am lost in amazement by you.

Though we don’t see each other every day, you are in my thoughts each moment of them, and in my heart always. Each time you are with me, though short it may be, our bond grows closer, stronger; our love and admiration for each other, between a daughter and her daddy, becomes deeper with each memory made.

You are not losing a daddy today, but instead gaining another who loves you just as deeply, just as fiercely, and loyally. You are gaining a step-mom today; who will forever be there for you in every way needed as I have, and will continue to always be there for you.

We are adding to our family, a wonderful woman, who will continue to love us both, and be an added cornerstone to the lives we are able to share with each other.

I love you Emersyn

Now and Always

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Winter’s Amusement

Used to be life made so much sense with everything floating perfectly
Nothing left to chance to be left behind forgotten sidelines
Time ticks away eating at all your hearts desires ungiving in it’s taking
Just takes the afternoons away sweeping them past by never seen again

Roads missed turns lead you to your next burns
Walk the fire without a rope beneath your souls
Dangling up on high deserted skies of desire
Desperate search shows everythings now long gone

Floating on the rainbows you hope keep their gold
While the emptiness fills you deep inside
Pains of waiting with unknown clouds so high
Falling further past your ledge expires

Spinning gears turn all around ready to crush your crown
Wrong move just once will bring you down to different clouds
Marching on without the cares of troubles made
Time gives not for your feeble minds
Or hearts desire

Used to be such bright sunny days
Winds of change come sweeping past the town
Cold winds to chill the bone
Stop a heart right in their tracks

Life had so much sense left within
Never swaying with the winds
How those days long for a return
Watch the steps plant your feet
Another chance to lose your self

Day begins with days endings not shown
Sail the race as best you could unknown
Why we deal with old machines
Unrelied for what they’d mean

Lost in the world trying to find a way home
Lose yourself in the innocents pure joys
Never stepping out of line
Is there any wisdom you can use?

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Life’s Gentle Dreams

Drifting softly across the waters façade
Swishing quietly under lights above
Peace settles around the gentle lapping
With light breezes kissing along the skins exposed

Tall pines marking the edges of serenity
With razors of rocks keeping all in shallows
Twists upon windings getting near
Sleep now gentle baby upon the waters wave

With moonlight guiding the path
Shorelines just within reach
THe vastness of dreams being to dance
Sweeping swiftly as childs feet

Dream now child of mine
Let your mind unwind this night
And find within all it’s missed
Waiting to join you on the shores
The beach where you’ll find peace to sleep

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What Distance Costs

Every day a struggle to find my way thru
Every day the marathon of taunting thoughts
Wrecking havoc ready to break free of me
Set aside the madness focus on the child

No one seems to understand what it really means
Living lies inside this head to make it thru the night
How far away the travel stays to take away
The miles racked up in between mountains and the sea
No one seems to understand what this distance costs

Alone in this head is not a safe place to live
For if you could see me, could you be near me
After learning all the truths trapped inside
With it’s long dark roads winding inside mazes

The child is long now lost unable to understand this
How many miles of traveling must be made
The woman by my side, seems I make her cry
With lonely distance the only thing at her side
No one seems to understand what this distance costs

Thousand miles here and there seems like nothing
But only to those not out there with me
Forget cross-country but mountains from the sea
Those winding roads slowly killing me

As I make my way to and from
My loving ones to my home
Six-hundred miles in the night
Is quite the sight
As I barrel down the roads

No one seems to understand what it really means
Living lies inside this head to make it thru the night
How far away the travel stays to take away
The miles racked up in between mountains and the sea
No one seems to understand what this distance costs

No one seems to understand what this distance demands
The sacrifices being made for the few hours one day
A heavy heart drives the car with eyes watery
For it’s two weeks time we must depart
But no one knows what this distance costs….

It’s broken hearts every time I say goodbye
With teary eyes for every mile I drive
A worn and battered soul
With a woman and a child waiting
For me to drive home along more lonesome miles

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