Whirlwinds Despair

When she looks at me
A sense of pain washes over
Waves of tears held back
Who am I in her eyes

Will she remember all I’ve done
Sacrifices that have been made
For her time is days
While I must live within this haze

I come and go
As weeks seem to disappear
Flying by my eyes
All those hopes and fears

Some days I’m everything
Most days wanting nothing of me
Kills me deeply every time
Knowing goes back and forth

Every time I try
Listen to her hopes and fears
Comfort best I can
And still she doesn’t want

Spend my nights holding back tears
Realize realities of my fears
Have all come true within her eyes
And emptiness fills me

Dark nights blacken broken hearts
Spreads all thru to days first light
As I cower in corners alone
Pain enough to drive most beyond

She’s only young so long
With precious years missed
How she can cut deep into me
Is amazingly scary to see

Empty room fills this night
All my doubts and fears
They’ve come free
Traveling throughout my room

Lost in a whirlwind of despair
That only pain can bring repair
If enough is had this night
Maybe I’ll be numb by dawns light